Stay-at-home-mommy

I realized several months ago that I was doing SAHM things I swore I would never do. For instance, when going grocery shopping I sometimes let Tiernan sit in the basket instead of the designated seat part of the shopping cart, my house is nowhere near as neat and clean and organized as I swore it would be when I could stay home all the time, although I always offer a healthy snack first, my kid prefers junk food over the nutrient rich good for you stuff and occasionally I give in...but I'm not fretting over any of this stuff. Now that I'm home full time I have a better understanding of why moms do those things I once found so horrible. Never in a million years would I have thought staying home would be so exhausting...even on lazy days when I don't get much done, I find myself dead tired at the end of the day. My mom always said once you have kids you'll never go to the bathroom alone again...she's pretty dead on. As a SAHM you never, ever get a break. I think part of it is cabin fever, I tend to feel more energized when I go out and do something fun during the day, but the other part is that you never really get to rest. Even during naptime, my mind is constantly going--waiting for Tiernan to wake up, thinking about what to make for dinner, planning for the upcoming days, and so on. As I'm chasing Tiernan around the house, pretending like he's too fast for me to catch him, or as I'm trying to keep him out of the kitchen sink while I cook dinner, or as I'm trying to convince Tiernan that naptime really is fun, I find myself wishing he had a pause button...like, "stay right there, let mommy have an uninterrupted rest, and then we'll resume." Then, as I'm trying to rest during naptime or at bedtime I frequently find myself wishing my brain had an off switch. Still, with all the chores that I feel like I should've done but didn't, through all of the tantrums, and with the extreme lack of privacy or down-time, I would never trade my job for anything.

This is why Steve and I made the decision that, unless financially necessary, I will be a SAHM until our youngest child is in school full time. Most people who know I recently finished my degree assume I'm going to start teaching right away. When I explain that, at best, I might substitute teach a day or two a week, I usually get very concerned looks. Steve and I knew as soon as we found out I was pregnant, actually before that even happened, that I would stay home with the kids as long as possible.

I feel incredibly lucky that I get to experience life as a SAHM and I don't regret "wasting" my degree. I am so blessed to have a hard-working husband who is willing to do whatever it takes to keep me at home. So for anyone concerned that my degree will not go to good use, don't worry, I use what I learned in college everyday with Tiernan. To those who are worried about us not having a two income household, don't worry, we have made wise financial decisions and are pretty good at living within the boundaries of our paycheck. Like every couple, we have rough patches we go through, but in general we are one happy family...and I am one happy SAHM.